No, that's not a carry on style header to a rude photo (and I do apologise if that was your search term and it brought you here).
Hmmm, yes, good old housespiders are the topic of conversation here.
I almost get bored of these spiders (surprising when spiders fascinate me).
I've had a few emails, and recently messages on Twitter, asking what these big spiders everyone is seeing at the moment are.
Plainly and simply, they are of the Tegenaria genus. You'll probably see many of them between now and early November. Having said that, they did seem to get sprinting across carpets earlier this year.
Generally they tend to be present from mid-September onwards. I don't really know why they've sprung to life two weeks earlier this year, but it's a bit of a pattern because I remember 2006 being similar.
Tegenaria are a totally harmless spider, but they CAN get quite large. Tegenaria Duellica (formerly Gigantea) can have a leg span of more than 13mm. Aside from the European Cave Spider and the Fen Raft Spider (neither of which you're likely to witness with ease) Tegenaria are undoubtedly the UK's largest arachnid. They once held the record for the world's fastest spider, even beating the Australian/Kiwi Huntsman (also harmless) until, during the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan drew people's attention to the Sun Spider or Camel Spider, which can run at 24mph. (However the Camel Spider is a solfigud and is technically a scorpion - I won't get bogged down here!)
So, those big buggers you'll see at this time of year. Can they bite? Back to my old argument. ALL spiders WILL try to bite when trapped. It's all down to how wide they can open their jaws. Generally, Tegenaria spiders (which do have a fairly potent venom) are highly unlikely to be able to widen their jaws enough to pierce flesh.
Tegenaria spiders are not known to bite and even where there have been reports of them biting in the UK, it's usually just an itchy irritation and a red mark.
The possible exception is Tegenaria Agrestis, which, while present in the UK, is feared in the USA, as the infamous 'Hobo Spider', which has lead to necrosis in bites.
The massive spiders you see in your homes in Autumn in the UK are most likely Tegenaria Duellica or Tegenaria Domestica. If you're really lucky (or unlucky if yo hate them) you might spot the rarer Tegenaria Atrica.
All four main Tegenaria species mate in autumn and go looking for some eight-legged naughtiness at this time of year. You're more likely to see a male than a female. They are easy to sex. The males have boxing glove-like pedipalps (sex glands) which look like odd feelers at either side of their mouthparts.
Honestly, please respect Tegenaria spiders. They are so harmless you wouldn't believe it. I know people have phobias, but there are worse bugs in our homes than spiders.
I include a photo of a Tegenaria Duellica sent to me for identification via twitter from a tweeter called @Jakemacphereson
He wasn't a fan of the spider he (thankfully) didn't kill, and, to be honest, it is a particularly big one.
This post ends sounding as rude as it started!
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